Jan 10 2009
Real Magic Lies Beyond the Strings
Have you ever been to one of those really low-quality magic shows? You know the type, the ones they have at kid’s birthday parties and stuff. Have you ever been watching a show like that and turned to the guy next to you to whisper a comment about how bad the show was only to find him mesmerized by the whole thing as if he couldn’t see the card sticking out the magician’s sleeve or the clearly visible string holding the “floating” wand in the air? It may surprise you to learn that I’m that guy.
In the course of my life, I’ve had to deal with many depressing things ranging from the loss of a child from cancer to a life-changing disability–none of which is the subject of this blog. I share laughter because humor shared grows into joy. It lightens the day for all of us. That’s what this blog is about. So what does all this have to do with crappy magic shows? Let me explain:
This post grew out of a recent discussion I had with Stephanie Barr . Stephanie is an incredibly intelligent person, literally a rocket scientist. She is also, however, by her own admission, a “professional wet blanket.” A “wet blanket,” by the way, is an expression describing someone who dampens the enthusiasm or enjoyment of others, generally by pointing out all the things that can go wrong with what they’re doing or all the reasons why they shouldn’t be doing it at all. Picture an actual wet blanket being thrown on a fire to put it out or at least dampen it down.
I suspect that Stephanie’s “wet blanket” tendencies are what drew her to become a scientist/engineer in the first place. A willingness to not accept things at face value, to doubt, and to attempt in every way to disprove a theory or figure out everything that might possibly go wrong is a basic prerequisite to being a good scientist–especially one that deals with rocket and/or space science.
I certainly feel better believing that those multi-ton payloads that keep floating around over our heads are being put there by people who are willing to spend a lot of time figuring out what could go wrong, what might break, and what unexpected circumstances might arise. This type of thinking, however, presents certain problems when it goes beyond the scope of work and starts getting applied in daily life.
There is a certain joy in life that can only be found if you’re willing to “look beyond the strings” to see the magic all around you. There is real magic in the world, not the mystical fantasy kind, but real beauty, joy, and selfless giving. It’s there if we look for it. The moon, for instance, is very romantic and magical…unless you’re the type of person who only sees it as a hunk of lifeless rock stuck in a gravity well.
I’m not espousing gullibility here. I despise blind faith. I believe in thinking carefully and considering as many options as possible before making a decision. But life is full of numerous details that don’t matter, that don’t hurt anyone, that aren’t wrong, and that don’t need to be pointed out to someone who’s enjoying the moment. (I’m not referring to Stephanie here; she just started me thinking along these lines.)
Some think it a small thing to ruin a moment of joy or happiness, but it isn’t. It’s a moment that will never exist again. In killing that moment, you destroy it not only for yourself, but for anyone that listens to you. Words have power. Do you really have such a plethora of moments to throw away? Probably not. And neither do those you take it from.
For what it’s worth, I would encourage everyone to “look beyond the strings,” to find the real magic in life all around them, to really enjoy the moments given to them. As many bad things as there are to go through and deal with in life, there are far more good.
Now, just so you know that I didn’t blind-side Stephanie with this article (sort-of about her,) that she not only knew I was going to write this, but that she even participated in it, I’m going to do something I very rarely do. I’m going to give her the last word.
Stephanie Barr, Rocket Scientist
Just going to add that, I, too, believe in magic and wonder and dreams. Being a rocket scientist or a chemist or a realist doesn’t mean that you can’t believe in magic. And, for the record, my wet-blanketing of him before was a joke. I do do that, though, and there are times it’s necessary. But even the space program wouldn’t have gotten off the ground without dreams and that’s its own magic.
Lesson Learned:
Look for the real magic in life and you’ll find it.
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What a beautiful post . Gives me something nice to think about first thing this morning!
I’d comment (again), but working on my science fiction/fantasy novel.
Yeah the real magic in life is finding that ‘nothing matter’s well according to the Diamond Sutra. I had outage for four hours yesterday so decided to do some pretty heavy reading..it helped lol. I was lucky enough in the evening to manage to watch a film about Aliens.that was peng Brovs.
Kim …. if you watch Stephanie’s blog, you’ll find that she does a regular Ask the…. feature (weekends, usually).
I’d recommend you watch for the next episode of Ask the Rocket Scientist for that one
This week is Ask The Dragon.
Having read a bunch of Stephanie’s fiction, I can assure you that she is not at all a wet blanket
Her novels are awesome… and I’m sure you’ll find them at a bookstore near you at some point, dizzblnd ….I have no doubt at all.
I am usually the wet blanket one in my relationship, I’m also the paranoid and the worry wart. It takes “the man” and my kids to bring out the fun side. Thanks for the reminder, I kind of needed it today. Magic really is all around us.
dizzblnd - I am indeed writing it and am darn near finished it. My other novel (finished) is true and pure fantasy, no science at all.
@Autism Insights: Thanks. I was worried about straying away from humor and dangerously close to philosophy.
@stephanieebarr: Cool. I’m a huge SciFi fan. By the way, just for the record, I did know you were joking.
@dizzblnd: Amusement is where you find it–even if you’re the only one who can see the humor in it.
@Insanity Kim: I feel sad for anyone that thinks that they can learn science from any form of televised science fiction–not that I don’t love them–but in some ways they’re more fantasy oriented than Lord of the Rings. By the way, I think that there’s an episode of Nova that covers that.
@yanjiaren: I would hate to think that nothing matters. It seems to be a defeatist attitude. I don’t see how it can accomplish anything. I hope that I’m not offending your beliefs, but I tend to measure the worth of my life by what I accomplish. Now I’m getting WAY too philosophical here. Anyway, thanks for stopping by to comment.
@flit: Dang, I want to read them.
@nipsy: I don’t exactly spend every second being all happy. I need reminders now and then too.
@Justin: It sounds kind of like watching Star Trek.
I do miss the Renaissance Faire. I haven’t been in ages. In High School I used to be part of the Society for Creative Anachronism. Lots of fun memories there.
I don’t consider myself a wet blanket… but I do have this habit of not taking things at face value either… a good example is all those urban legend emails that get passed around (or posted on blogs!) by people who think they are true: I’m the one who will reply / comment with a reference to snopes.com, trying not to be too snarky about it!
Really liked this post. I’m a magic watcher married to a wet-blanket. I’m happy to say that right now my kids are magic-watchers too. Sometimes I feel badly for Da Husband in that he misses too much by letting himself get overwhelmed by the details. Oh well. Both are good and both bring something great to the table now don’t they?
Wow, great blog! Lots of good content here. I dropped!
[EDIT]…extra link removed…[/EDIT]
Hey, everyone. I’m still here in case you were wondering. I’ve been getting a bunch of new work recently designing web sites and new WordPress themes. Money is very handy when you have a wife and three daughters.
@Paul Baines: Hey, Paul, thanks for stopping by and commenting. Let me know when that history thing starts working out, because it doesn’t seem to be doing too well yet.
@lynne: Those things (along with the “new virus warning” emails) are just garbage. Not only do my friends think that they’re doing me a favor, they’re also including my email address in a massive list of people they’re sending it to. Has no one heard of BCC?
@Stacy: “I am the optimist to my hubby’s pessimism…He keeps me grounded, and I keep him believing in ‘magic’.” Therein lies the secret to a lasting marriage. Doubling up on either side would probably not work out too well.
@JeD Chan: Hey, JeD, thanks for thinking of me. I do appreciate it. Unfortunately, as I’ve had to say before, I really can’t accept the award. By my last count, I would have had to have done at least six posts with seven to ten linked nominations each. (That’s not meant as an indirect way of bragging, by the way.) I hope you can see where this might start losing me my regular readers. By the way, I do the typo stuff all the time. It’s just that I get to go back and fix it here.
@Jordan: Cool, I got a comment from a real magician. Welcome, Jordan. Thanks for stopping by. One of my favorite things about watching a magic show is the sense of possibility that you feel afterward. I wish that I could carry that for a longer period of time.
@ettarose: Personally, I find that the more I learn, the more amazing I realize everything is.
@Jen: To this day, I still feel thankful for the three years we had with our daughter who died of cancer. (She would be 15 now.) We knew exactly what was going on and had time to say and do the things we would have regretted not having done. I can’t even imagine losing a child unexpectedly. The real trick in living is not letting the pain fill so much of our vision that we can’t see the good things.
@kellyology: Absolutely agree with you. I’m glad you stopped by to comment. I’m really enjoying your blog as well. Someone needs to cover the other side of the coin.
@Aria’z Ink: You mean that isn’t real???
@Insanity Kim: Are you talking about the shows lying to you or the commercials between the shows?
@Dan Brantley: Improv is a whole different world of comedy than straight stand-up (he said with a straight face as if he’d ever done it before.) It’s a special talent in and of itself. The thing about accepting compliments is especially appropriate. We’re always our own worse critic.
@michellem: Thanks, michellem. I hope you’ll come back often.